Freakin' Out!

 {pic from Giggles n' Grins}

I turned thirty over the weekend. Wow, I said it. I didn’t say twenty-five again or fifteen times two, I did however cringe when I typed it (proof reading  is going to be was hard). I don’t feel any different than I did a few days ago but it was pointed out to me that I canceled my own birthday dinner because the weather was bad and that would not have happened in my twenties. That’s how you know you’re old you do “responsible” things… sometimes. 

But I digress, I accidentally dressed like a ballerina this morning for work. That’s the point of my ramble. I wore a light pink skirt, white sweater, paired with some white tights and totally rockin’ boots and had my hair in buns.  I didn’t mean to but when Chris pointed it out the nine-year-old in me, infinitely pleased with herself, smiled and twirled a few times. What girl doesn’t want to be a ballerina?

I like the way I look today but is it okay for a thirty-year-old? I noticed in the mirror that I was looking old. Do I have to change my style? I do not want to be that woman getting a makeover because she can’t dress her age. I tend to me more courageous in my attire the older I get. I like the freedom that comes with not caring so deeply what people think. I’m totally freaking out about what it means to be thirty! Screw it, I’m just going to do my own thing and if anyone asks I’m twenty-five.

Past and Present

I was writing a blog post about turning thirty, took a quick break to let it percolate, and came across this post by Rachel. The fact that she’s turned a bit introspective because of her upcoming thirtieth birthday made me feel so much better. So here goes a little Past and Present:

Past

*I was painfully shy. I broke out in hives the day I had to sing my Senior Solo for choir. I still got up on stage and sung my little heart out even though it was the scariest thing I’ve ever done in my life!

*I had a debilitating weakness for candy in any shape or form. I couldn’t go through the check out without buying something, or several somethings.

*I was able to travel to France and Italy with family my senior year in high school. While staying in a tiny town of Chiusi, Italy my uncle and I snuck into an archeological dig and looked around. It was amazing!

*I never felt like I fit in. I always felt like I was on the outside looking in.

*My fondest childhood memories are of my siblings playing with all of our neighbors. I will always consider the kids I grew up with additional relatives. You might not see them often but they hold a special place in your heart.

*Dying would have been preferable to wearing shorts, skirts, or dresses. I was very much a tomboy.


Present

*I take time to appreciate the beauty in everyday things like foggy days, budding flowers, thunderstorms, food smeared faces. I finally realized it's the imperfections that make things beautiful.

*I can make conversation, a skill that is not perfected but has taken YEARS to cultivate.

*I dream of a small house with a big kitchen and large yard where I can watch my kids grow. Oh, and a craft room where we can make things together. I think an attic would make a great craft room!

*I still get as giddy as a school girl when I go to a candy shop but I don’t have to have everything. Also, I can now go through a check out without buying candy. I should get a gold star for that one.

*I have more of a style. It’s still developing and I’m still a tomboy but I no longer exclude shorts, skirts, or dresses from my wardrobe.

*I still don’t feel like I fit in but I have a great group of friends so it doesn’t matter as much now. I’m nerdy, corny, awkward, and it’s okay because my close friends still think I’m awesome. Thanks for that guys, love ya bunches.

What are some of your Past and Presents?

(I can't spell, then or now...)

Michgian Love Monday

Last Friday Ponti, of Living with a Carnivore, and I were wandering around in downtown Royal Oak and she took me to Gayle’s Chocolates. Let me tell you I was in chocolate heaven. I couldn’t stop oooing and awing. The first thing I saw when I walked in were these amazing chocolate shoes! 

After taking in the sites I took a seat on the cool vintage bar stools at the counter and ordered the most delicious hot chocolate.  I couldn’t really taste the espresso part but I was strangely okay with that.

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Introducing: Ellie Jelly Belly

I almost got my wish for a Valentine's Day niece; Elizabeth Lee was born February 15^th, 8 lbs 10 oz. I cannot begin to express my happiness at this little chunks arrival. (I’m guessing that my sister feels the same way as she was a week past her due date.) I have not been able to visit her yet as the boys have been sick and I have been without a car but I will soon!

I will squish cheeks...

Permission Granted

I was getting my daily blog fix over at scoutiegirl and came across her post about poke-the-box . This really hit a chord with me. Reading it brought tears to my eyes because I often let my fear of failing keep me from doing things. I have a list of million dollar ideas, seriously, that will stay a list until something is done about them. How often do you feel like your creativity or uniqueness is stifled or you want to hide it because you’re just not doing what everyone else is doing?

Strangely enough I was feeling that exact way this morning getting ready for work. I received this amazing scarf for Christmas, fell in love instantly, but I couldn’t quite bring myself to wear it in public. I love it but would other people? Would they love it on me? I got ready for work this morning with the intent to wear it with a belt to keep it in place but I chickened out. I wore layers incase this happened. It’s with me right now and I’m going to the bathroom and putting it back on! And you know what, this might be a HUGE fail in the fashion department but that’s okay!!! I’m allowed to fail... A lot!

Obsession

I've been told that both my grandma's had treadle Singer sewing machines. I'd like to say that my new obsession with them is due to memories of my childhood but that would be lying. I don't remember anything about my grandma's sewing machines. Sewing machines were never of any interest to me when I was younger.

When I was sixteen my mother gave me a sewing machine as a birthday present. I cried. She told me then, “one day you'll thank me that you have this.” After years and years of disinterest I got it out to sew my baby-on-the-way a quilt and I haven't put it away since. (Seriously, it sits on my kitchen table and only goes to the craft room if I have to.)

I know exactly where my new obsession stems. Cash and Cari, the HGTV show, I totally blame them. They were having an estate sale next to my best friends house so we ventured over for a peek and the first thing I notice is a busted up vintage Singer sitting in a puddle on the garage floor. I went through the whole house and didn’t see anything else that sparked my interest. I asked how much but alas it was way more than I had on me so I passed. I might have said no thanks to that one but I couldn’t get it out of my head. I hopped on Craiglist mostly to show myself what a deal I missed out on but instead I found one in my town at a great price! Talk about the stars aligning!

This is my vintage Singer, made in 1900. Isn't she gorgeous for 111 years old?! I'm so excited to get this beauty working again.

Michigan Love Monday

World Clothes Line is taking center stage in today’s Michigan Love Monday with the delivery of their Detroit Donations (shown in the video above.) If you haven’t heard me rave about them before they are a company in Michigan that matches any purchase you make with an equal donation.  Amazing right? They are having a Charity night this Wednesday March, 2^nd click here for more info! I love that this is a compay from Michigan giving back to our community as well as others who are in need. The force is strong with them.

P.S. Does anyone know the song playing? I LOVE it!